Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
