I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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