Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Randomize
