We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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