Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
