this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
