there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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