quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I can't turn off my feet"
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize