i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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