Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
We need to rekindle our bromance
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Just puked most of my soul out..
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
