I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
accomplished twins. life is a go
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize