he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
