You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
