so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
