Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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