Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
