You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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