weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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