There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
3pm strippers are depressing
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
