hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
