she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
