Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
