In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
