Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
