Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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