Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Randomize
