JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Randomize
