Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize