Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed

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(206): View more from Washington

tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

did he notice?

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..

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(732): View more from New Jersey

i dont know what to do

(1-732): View more from New Jersey

with your life?

(732): View more from New Jersey

no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3

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(512): View more from Texas

You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot

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(530): View more from California

Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.

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(256): View more from Alabama

The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔

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