Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
