Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize