im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize