dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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