So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
