if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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