these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
