Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Randomize
