dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
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