His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
