What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize