There is no way he is gay with that hair.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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