the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
