is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
