She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
We had sex on a dog bed..
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
