i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
