sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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