Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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