Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
