I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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