you win again, gameday.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Let's paint friendship bongs
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
