watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
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